Emily Allgair, Editor
1. Blowing your nose in class
You gotta do what you gotta do and everyone in your classroom has blown their nose before, like they know the feeling and will not judge for it.
2. Tying your shoes
Your shoes coming untied literally has nothing to do with you and if anything it’s more embarrassing to be walking with your shoes untied.
3. Carrying an umbrella in the rain
People without umbrellas who are caught in a rain storm are more likely to be jealous of you for thinking ahead than judge you for choosing to stay dry for the rest of the day.
4. Having a crush
Sometimes crushes lead to exciting things and if they don’t, no one has to know that you have one, especially not the person to whom your affection lies. Just keep your own secret and there is nothing embarrassing about having feelings of attraction.
5. Getting in an Uber (sober)
Literally there is no reason for this one other than the fact that you have to check the license plate number and get in all awkwardly. The ride itself isn’t even embarrassing, it’s just getting into the car and ‘introducing’ yourself to the driver.
6. Having COVID in 2022
COVID is so 2020, like come on girl it’s been two years. Get over yourself soon.
7. Putting change away in front of the cashier
You just stand there struggling to put the ones into your wallet as they fold in on themselves and there’s a line of people behind you waiting to check out. Like the pressure is on to move quickly and you can’t keep up.
8. Walking back to your seat after bowling
Everyone is looking at you and sometimes you turn before the ball hits the pins so you have to turn back and look over your shoulder but everyone is still watching you. And the shoes are kind of slippery so you have to change your normal walking pace, it’s just a lot.
9. Having people sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to you
Again, everyone is looking at you. Not even just looking, but serenading you. Like come on, that’s so overwhelming, especially when you don’t really know everyone singing to you or there’s a lot of people. Like what do you do? Do you smile? For the whole time? Do you sing along? I don’t know!
10. Having the hiccups
Going back to the first one, everyone has had the hiccups before and everyone knows that they are uncontrollable. It just feels like everyone is paying attention to you when in reality, again, no one is going to judge you for your diaphragm contracting, like it’s totally normal.