Enrique Carrasco, Editor 

David hates seed oil. David is against big pharma. David uses my sink even though he has his own sink and he should just learn to unclog a sink like a normal person. Also, every time I have friends over, David always finds some way to scare them away. One might even say he scares the hoes. David for some reason always has his light on even if he’s not home, and it makes it really weird for when I need something from him and he’s not home. He’s really dumb, and really stupid, and he smells good bad, and drinks unpasteurized milk and I wish David would just behave like a normal roommate and like a normal managing editor. Also, Dave always likes to censor what I say and that is NOT cool.